Stay at Home Mom.com

We just got back from the dentists office and one of the kids has three cavities. UGh. So many people go without medical insurance let alone dental insurance. But there is a great dental insurance plan that is not very expensive. It is called toothpaste. holy moly. It is really pretty simple, cost effective and can save your family tons of money.

Taking care of your kids (and your own teeth) is soooo important and ultimately will save your family so much money. I do not have any solid statistical numbers but our personal experience has been that a typical family will probably spend up to $7000 per kid on dental care (if they go to the orthodontist as well) over 18 years. That is almost $400 per year on each kid to take care of their teeth. For our kid with cavaties we are going to end up spending closer to $10,000 over the span of 18 years. yikes. That could buy alot of toothpaste.

So, here are a couple of ideas to help your kids take care of their teeth.

• Start early - once their teeth come in get a soft toothbrush and get them used to brushing after meals right from the start.
• Brush your teeth with them - show them the right way to brush and do it with them so they can see you brushing your teeth and they know that it is not only important to you but easy to do.
• Remember flossing - help them learn how to floss regularly. Our house is split between the traditional floss and floss picks. I love floss picks - they are a little more expensive but if they get a kid (or a parent) to floss more often then they are worth it. If you have never seen a floss pick you can usually find them in the toothpaste / toothbrush aisle. They are little sticks just a little longer than a toothpick that have a preloaded floss at the end making it a little easier to floss some of the back teeth.
• Brush for at least 2 minutes preferrably 4 - A great way to help your kids with this is to either get a kitchen timer in the bathroom (this also works to time showers which we have had to limit on occassion now that we have teenagers). The other way to encourage longer brushing is to get your kid a tooth tunes toothbrush. You can find these at the variety stores like Target and Walmart. Each toothbrush plays a different song. You can let your kid pick out their own song and then they have to brush their teeth until the song is over.
• Get regular check ups - it is much easier on the checkbook to catch a problem early. Find it in your budget to make this happen. Most dentist offices will help you set up a payment plan if that is easier. If they won’t work with you then find another dentist. There are lots of them out there. Finding a dentist that is great with kids is another way to encourage your kids. Our youngest loves going to his dentist because they listen to him when he is there. There are also a number of free and reduced priced dental clinics. Check with your local social services department to see if you can take advantage of some of these programs. It is too important to not take the time. There are a lot of caring dentists out there volunteering their time to make sure all young children at least get checked for basic dental care.
• Finally, establish good eating and snacking routines for your kids - at this last visit our dentist reminded my son that when he is playing video games or watching movies with his friends one of the worst things he could do is to sip a can of pop over a long period of time. This slow exposure to sugar over longer periods of time is terrible for his teeth. Encourage your kids to drink water or other drinks that won’t tear up their teeth. Encourage them to choose an apple over some sugary snack. This was easy for me to do when my kids were preschool age but once they became teenagers and were spending more time at other friends houses this became more of a challenge. Help them make better choices for their teeth’s sake.

As we are heading back to the dentist to fill three cavaties I am encouraging all the Stay at Home Moms out there to invest a little time in starting your kids out early and having them checked routinely to catch any problems early. Good Luck. And just think, by saving over $3000 per kid on dental care, you and your hubby could take a trip to Hawaii with all the money you saved.

The thought for the day has been the old adage of leading by example. If you want kids who are respectful of their elders then show them by being respectful to your elders. If you want kids that are helpful, participate in community service projects or have family chores that are done all together (it is always amazing to me to see how helpful kids will be if they are working alongside a grownup who is doing the same chore). If you want kids that love to laugh, then have a good laugh everyday. It is really just that simple.

Today I received a huge compliment that has encouraged me to live these lessons I want to impart on my kids. There are a couple of kids in my youngest sons class who have a reputation for being a little wild and I have been concerned about my kid hanging out with them because I don’t want him to get in trouble just because he may be in the wrong place at the wrong time. So, he asked if these kids could come to our house and play and I said that would be great. When these boys arrived at our house they were very polite and talked with me and said thanks for inviting them over. I watched them play and they were all nice to each other and if I asked them to do something or explained some of the house rules they all complied without hesitation.

So, here comes the compliment part. I saw one of these boys grandmothers tonight. I told her how polite her grandson had been at our house. She said that the last time he came home from our house he told his mother that he really liked playing here because I talked to him like a human being. When his mom asked him what he meant he said “Well she just talks to me like I’m a person and she doesn’t yell at me like I get when I go to other kids homes”.

This meant alot to me. I once heard a story Zig Ziglar told about his grandaughter. She was two years old and the family kept complaining that she was wild and going through the “terrible twos”. So, everytime he saw her he would call her Sunshine and remind her about all the good things she was doing. Whenever she was around Zig she was always a beautiful well behaved two year old.

It’s not always as simple as calling a child by a positive knickname but it certainly helps. In the bible it tells us to treat others as you would want to be treated and that includes our kids.

Show them by example how to interact with each other. And when there is behavior that you want to change try to work it out calmly. If this is challenging then be sure to read my last entry “picking your battles”.

Hang in there and enjoy every minute. It really does fly by.

I have loved being a stay at home mom. Some of my favorite moments are those when I knew exactly what to say to one of my kids. My kids are getting older now and the oldest two are full fledged teenagers.

It is always important to say what you mean with your kids and to be very clear in your directions. Even still, this becomes critical with teenagers. We have great kids and so far and we there have not been any big challenges yet that we couldn’t handle by just talking with them. (knock on wood). When I was growing up we didn’t have cell phones and so if I was late getting home I could always say I wanted to call but there was no phone around. Nowadays though our kids take a cell phone with them when they go out and so up to this point we have not had any troubles with anyone coming home late.

When our boys are going out I usually ask them when they will be back and they have up to this point determined an appropriate time to come back home for the night. This has generally been no later than 9 on school nights and midnight on weekends.

So, the other night our 16 year old was heading out and I asked him when he would be back and he said, “I think I’ll come home when I feel like it”. This, of course, is the wrong answer. I wanted to yell at him “I don’t think so mister” but he is a really really good kid and so I calmly said “That’s fine - as long as you feel like coming home before 9″. He kind of laughed and we both knew he was just testing me to say what I would say.

So, moms just a little reminder to pick your battles. Know when to just handle things with a little humor, when to let things slide and when to sit your kid down for a serious discussion. Remember from the moment your child is born they will try to determine what it takes to get what they want from you - when they are little they cry and have tantrums to see if you will bend to their whim and buy something off the list at the grocery store. When they get older they get a little more creative in testing their boundaries.

Stay calm and pick your battles. Say what you mean and it will really pay off when they are teens.