I have loved being a stay at home mom. Some of my favorite moments are those when I knew exactly what to say to one of my kids. My kids are getting older now and the oldest two are full fledged teenagers.

It is always important to say what you mean with your kids and to be very clear in your directions. Even still, this becomes critical with teenagers. We have great kids and so far and we there have not been any big challenges yet that we couldn’t handle by just talking with them. (knock on wood). When I was growing up we didn’t have cell phones and so if I was late getting home I could always say I wanted to call but there was no phone around. Nowadays though our kids take a cell phone with them when they go out and so up to this point we have not had any troubles with anyone coming home late.

When our boys are going out I usually ask them when they will be back and they have up to this point determined an appropriate time to come back home for the night. This has generally been no later than 9 on school nights and midnight on weekends.

So, the other night our 16 year old was heading out and I asked him when he would be back and he said, “I think I’ll come home when I feel like it”. This, of course, is the wrong answer. I wanted to yell at him “I don’t think so mister” but he is a really really good kid and so I calmly said “That’s fine - as long as you feel like coming home before 9″. He kind of laughed and we both knew he was just testing me to say what I would say.

So, moms just a little reminder to pick your battles. Know when to just handle things with a little humor, when to let things slide and when to sit your kid down for a serious discussion. Remember from the moment your child is born they will try to determine what it takes to get what they want from you - when they are little they cry and have tantrums to see if you will bend to their whim and buy something off the list at the grocery store. When they get older they get a little more creative in testing their boundaries.

Stay calm and pick your battles. Say what you mean and it will really pay off when they are teens.