A Message to Moms on back to school

Hi! I'm a mom.  I remember that morning that was almost like any other morning.  We got up, got breakfast, went into the boys little bedroom and my oldest son picked out a greenish polo shirt and his favorite jeans. We brushed teeth and hair and he picked up the backpack that seemed like it was almost bigger than this darling little boy.  We drove on over to the school and parked.  We were early but so were most of the other parents and kids.

I looked into his small, fresh face.  There was no hint of fear or anticipation.  Today was just another day to discover new things.  He was ready.  I wasn't sure if I was ready. What would this mean. His first day in school. Would he find friends? Would he succeed? Would he still want a hug from his mom when he got home? I stood there holding the little hand of his younger brother who looked more excited about everything going on than his brother.

That was 20 years ago.

It could have been yesterday.

Back to School

This week is just another week for him.  No fear or anticipation.  Just a bright smile as he grabs his cup of coffee, makes a lunch, and heads out for work and school.  (Yes he has moved back in with us while he finishes up college).

This week that same little brother (that held my hand all those years ago and watched his older brother walk into the school building for the first time all by himself) heads off to college.  Two younger siblings prepare for their Senior and Junior year of High School.

They are all ready. I'm not sure if I'm ready.

From that day that I sent my oldest off to school for the first time up until today almost seems like a blur.  I remember so many laughs, homework assignments, slumber parties, new cell phones, birthday parties, bike rides, movie nights and discussions around the family dinner table.

Today, as I drove with my daughter to pick up her school supplies I marveled at the time gone by.  We didn't even need to go down the school supply aisle to get everything on her list.  This year a new yoga matt and yoga pants were on the list. I love this girl. She is smart, interesting, and a very nice person.

So here is my note to all of those moms who are sending their kids off to school for the first time this year:

As moms we often worry about whether or not we are doing everything we can to give our babies every opportunity.  We worry that we have done everything we can to help them develop a strong self-esteem. We worry that we have done everything to ensure their good health. We worry worry worry.  We want the best for them.

They say we are raising children but we aren't.

With every day, with every action, with every laugh we are raising young people that will someday be awesome adults. We are raising adults. We oftentimes focus on them as children and forget that they are watching our every move and will learn more from what they see us doing and what it means to be an adult than what they will learn in school.

Be the grown up you want for your kid. Show them what it means to be a grown up. Then if you are lucky, and have given them the room to make mistakes, then when they have grown up and become young adults they will be be interesting, smart, fun people that you really enjoy spending time with.

Remember you don't have to work so hard. Be you. If you are worried about their self-esteem just remember a smile from you and an interest in their thoughts is more important than an extra piano lesson. If you are worried about their good health remember they are watching you sit on the couch and all the junk food you eat. If you are worried about them having friends then listen to them and show them how to be a good listener.

Raise them to be the adults you would want to hang out with when they are older.

Everything else is a blur.